Wednesday, October 03, 2007

Ten Worst Attractions of DisneyWorld

The Tonymation family just returned from a long vacation. We spent 11 days at our favorite theme park, Walt DisneyWolrd.

I had an interesting conversation with a friend who works at the parks regarding his list of the ten worst attractions there. So, I thought it would be fun to do a ten worst list myself. So here goes...

Top Ten Worst Attractions of DisneyWorld

10. O' Canada
This is one of those 360 degree "circle vision" movies, and it was recently revamped to be hip and edgy. The older film had no celebrities in it, and made Canada look like a nice retirement home for the elderly. Now they spiced it up by adding Martin Short as host, and some new clips of extreme sports, to make it look like a dream vacation for a teenager. My main problem with it is that you have to stand up through the entire show. When I go into an attraction, I like to enjoy air conditioning and take a load off of my feet. The imagineer that thought it would be a great idea to cram a bunch of sweaty, smelly, hot, exhausted people into a standing room only theater to watch a film about a country, must have been either insane, or just loves to torture tourists.

9. Sounds Dangerous
Summary: you listen to a not so interesting story unfold in a pitch black room. Any questions?

8. Disney-MGM Studios Backlot Tour
This attraction has been gutted thanks to the Lights Motors Action Extreme Stunt Show. It has been reduced to the pre-show, and ride through an alley they call a "boneyard", their props and wardrobe building, and the catastrophe canyon. For those that rode it in its original state, it is a sad skeleton of what it once was.

7. Dinoland in Animal Kingdom
Yes, this entire section of Animal Kingdom makes my list of worst attractions. You have an entire section of this not so interesting park devoted to a carnival theme. Who was in on this meeting?!!! The poster child attraction, Primeval Whirl, is a jerky ride that, by centrifugal force, slides you back and forth into your neighbor so you can get up close and personal with perfect strangers in the hot sticky Florida sun.... yay.

6. Ellen's Energy Adventure
If the goal of an attraction is to be long and boring, this one has hit the mark. Hey everyone, come in, sit on the floor and watch Ellen dream about being a stupid contestant on Jeopardy. Bill Nye the Science Guy shows up, and after you ride the endless and tiresome attraction filled with propaganda, she's a genius. The end.

5. Voyage of the Little Mermaid
I love this film, and I used to love this attraction back in the day when it was what it was intended to be. Now, it has been shortened down to fit more showtimes per day. An entire song was removed, and the entertaining spotlight on Sebastian featuring a puppet of his likeness, has been reduced to a mere cameo. In fact, the show is just a hodge podge of cameos of the characters in the film. Half of the attraction is footage from the actual film. It's a shame.

4. Stitch's Great Escape
What used to be a pretty intense attraction called Alien Encounter, is now the tame and eventless attraction starring Stitch. I wasn't a big fan of the original attraction, but at least it was entertaining. I could recreate this attraction at home by merely turning the lights off, blowing on your face, and spritzing you with a water bottle.

3. Journey Into Narnia
Didn't this movie come out 2 years ago? Why are they showing us the movie trailer and calling it an attraction?

2. Pooh's Playful Spot
I have a great idea. Let's close a really cool attraction, and replace it with a playground that has virtually nothing to do in it. This is what had to be the pitch for this pathetic attraction. This area used to be the home of the beloved Submarine ride. Now it has been reduced to a character meet and greet spot for Pooh characters. I can't believe they even list it as an attraction. It falls in the category of wasted space.

And my number one worst attraction of Walt DisneyWorld is...

1. Journey Into Imagination with Figment
Let's be honest here... this ride is supposed to be about imagination. Tap into that brain of yours and create people. This is the inspiration for the attraction. Yet, we see bland walls that are supposedly an imagination lab for the first half of the ride. The premise gives this ride the potential to be one of the coolest attractions at DisneyWorld. Unfortunately, it is one of the dullest. The imagineers that created this ride should be ashamed of themselves. Where is the creativitiy!

Thanks for reading, and stay tuned for my top ten best attractions list coming soon.

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